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Coping with Loss and Grief
How to Deal with Loss of a Relationship
 Students are faced with unique academic, social, and personal concerns during their college years. During this time students will be making some of the most important decisions in their life related to career choices, finances, geographic location, and marriage and family issues. It is an exciting time that presents some unique challenges.
While in college, some students are faced with additional concerns, such as dealing with a significant loss. At a time where students are geographically distant from their families and are in the process of separating and becoming more independent, they may find themselves coping with a loss of a significant relationship. This may be due to geographic separation, death, illness, divorce, or relationship breakup. This creates an unusual amount of stress when added to the heavy academic and social demands of college life. For many students it may be their first experience with losing someone close to them and it may be difficult to know how to deal with the loss.
Coping with a loss is difficult under the best of circumstances. Students may find themselves experiencing:
- Sleep disturbance ( sleeping too little or too much)
- Eating disturbance ( loss of appetite for overeating)
- Crying episodes
- Depressed mood
- Easy to anger and/or sudden mood changes
- Low energy
- Decrease in physical activity
- Low self-esteem
- isolation
- Guilt
- Sense of spiritual loss or confusion
- Decrease academic performance
Hopes, dreams, and aspirations may have been shattered and individuals may find themselves without purpose. We grieve for what we have no longer. We may feel lost and without a sense of direction or meaning in life.
How to Deal with Loss/Grief :
Although there is no "one-way" to cope with a significant loss, here are some ways to help the healing process along:
- Talk to a trusted friend or family member
- Keep to your ordinary routine and activities
- Exercise regularly
- Do things with friends and avoid isolation for extended periods of time
- Think is positive terms and avoid negative self-talk
- Decide what things you can control and which things are not within your ability to change. We sometimes can't change what is happening but we can change "how we think about it."
- Eat regular balanced meals
- Develop a plan related to any sleep problems that may occur (see Additional Resources)
- Accept that you will have "down" moods and crying episodes and that it is a normal reaction
- Give yourself time to grieve
- Keep a journal
- Get a physical exam
- Draw upon your religious and spiritual faith
- Seek Counseling Services
Student Counseling services may be helpful to students who are experiencing a grief reaction to a significant loss in their life. The opportunity to sort through the variety of feelings and emotions helps the person through the grief process and find their own unique way of facilitating their healing.
Appointments:
If you, or someone that you know is experiencing the loss of a significant relationship, Student Services can be of help. Appointments for Personal Counseling may be made by contacting:
Student Counseling Center
University Center, Room 274
Phone: (903) 566-7254
Office hours: 8 a.m. - 5 p.m.
Every effort will be made to schedule an appointment at the earliest time available and at the student's convenience. Students may visit the counseling center with our without an appointment, but an appointment is recommended. Clients are asked to call 24 hours prior to the scheduled appointment time if they are unable to keep their appointment.
Additional Resources:
Disclaimer
The Student Counseling Center does not guarantee the reliability of information on the links that are not necessarily operated by University of Texas at Tyler. We do not review or monitor the content of non-University of Texas at Tyler web sites. Links are provided as a service to our visitors. Your use of these web sites is subject to the terms and conditions of those sites.
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